Casual Chat

Part 1

Dave: Morning. How are things?
Anne: Not bad. How about you? Been up to much recently?
Dave: Not really. A little busy at work, but apart from that, not much.
Anne: That’s better than me: I’m snowed under at work. I’ve hardly any free time at the moment.
Dave: I’m sorry to hear that. I was going to ask if you fancied joining Philip and me at the movies this Friday.
Anne: I would if I could, but I’m afraid I have to work late every day this week.
Dave: Don’t worry about it. Maybe next time.
Anne: Sure. I’m sure I’ll catch up with you once things have eased off at work.

Notes

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Part 2

Dave: Beautiful weather, isn’t it? It really puts a spring in one’s step.
Philip: Yep, it’s been nice all week. Hey, listen, did you get the chance to speak to Anne?
Dave: Yeah, but she won’t be able to join us; she’s kinda busy at work this week.
Philip: That’s a shame. Well, since we have a spare ticket, why don’t we invite Bob?
Dave: Oh god, not Bob. Anyone but Bob.
Philip: I don’t know what you have against him. He’s OK.
Dave: You’re joking, right? Honestly, that guy is an idiot.
Philip: Fine, we’ll not invite Bob. How about Emili?
Dave: Yeah, OK. She’s alright, and I haven’t seen her for ages. Do you have her number?
Philip: Let me check. (looking in phone) Yes, here we are. Ok, I’ll give her a call after lunch.
Dave: Right. So, whatdaya want to do now? Fancy some lunch?
Philip: Sure, why not. I’m starving.
Dave: I’m so hungry I could eat a horse. Burger King?
Philip: How about Arby’s?
Dave: Sure. Makes no difference to me.

Notes

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Part 3

If you think about it, how many of the things that you talk about during a day are truly important? On the surface, perhaps not many; but communicating is a key part of human life. Making small talk is an important part of any culture, no matter whether it is about the weather, last night’s game, office gossip, or complaining about a friend. Human beings are, on the whole, a social animal and talking is one way in which we interact (some people even say our ability to communicate makes us above other animals).

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Part 4

A lot of people never think about small talk – it is merely communicating – but there are some people who find it boring, and others who are scared of sounding dull. There are also people who, quite simply, can’t think of anything good to say. Whilst the internet and the self-help book market have, for many years, looked to capture these people with ‘experts’ hoping to persuade them to part with their cash, most ideas are roughly similar:
• If you don’t know anyone at a party, look for friendly groups, or people on their own. They are more likely to want to talk to you than couples, who will think you are a ‘third wheel’.
• Ask questions that let people explain their thinking (rather than ‘yes/no questions’). This opens up conversation quicker.
• If you are on a date, try to find out your date’s opinions and feelings by asking what he/she thinks. This is better than telling stories to show how funny or clever you are.
• If you have only just met someone, don’t get too deep, philosophical or political. Meeting people should be fun, and these topics can always be explored later.
• If you want to impress someone, add some things that show that you notice them, such as what they are drinking, looking at, or wearing.
• Don’t be scared. You might think people don’t want to talk to you because you are a stranger, but actually most people like meeting new people. If it doesn’t work out, don’t worry: there are 7 billion people on Earth, and somebody out there wants to talk to you!

Notes

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